This year I turn 26; which means the first half of my 20s is over. From 20 to 25 so much has changed. I went from a single college student who was planning to leave the country and move to Switzerland, to a married stay at home mom of three. My early 20’s I told myself I was kind, and sure I didn’t go around kicking puppies or punching babies, but as I’ve learned, kindness means more than that. I was angry, and resentful, and unforgiving. I didn’t forgive others, and certainly didn’t forgive myself. My early 20’s were not spent the traditional way, but they were full of lessons.
I’ve spent the better part of last year really trying to work on myself. I’ve learned that there is a lot more to being a good person than just deciding to be one. It’s hard to forgive, but you should. It’s hard to accept that you cannot change everything, but you have to. I’ve learned that happiness is a choice, and you should choose it every morning. I’ve learned that another persons actions and words are powerful, but do not dictate my response; my power lies in my response. Perspective is everything; and some times changing your perspecticals and looking at the bigger picture can really change how you feel. I’ve learned that sometimes the best thing you can do is to do nothing, and sometimes the worst thing you can do is nothing. I’ve learned to look for the joy, but don’t ignore the sadness. I’m learning that I have to remind myself all of this every day, it’s easy to slip backwards. Being this person is a choice every morning. I’m learning to be kinder towards everyone, especially myself.
At 26 years young I feel lighter (not physically because you know- baby weight) but my mind and heart have grown lighter. Fuller than ever, but lighter. I’m overwhelmed by this life I’ve built for myself and my children. It is so full of love and laughter and joy. It’s hard, but the good kind. It’s stressful, but I trust that I’m supported. It’s good, and I’m so happy it’s mine. I’m so happy to be me today.
Plus, I just got a new bike and I’m forcing my husband to support my dream of being a biking family. Even though I haven’t been on a bike in like ten years.